Embrace Your Quirks
Ironically, embracing your awkwardness is the best way to become less awkward. Accept your quirks and all the cool things that make you unique. Maybe it’s the gap between your front teeth, your innovative sense of style, or your crazy knitting skills, accept every part of yourself and surround yourself with people who accept you too!
Keep A Journal
The benefits of journaling are immense. I’ve kept a journal consistently for nearly three years now and while I’ve always been introspective, I have never been more in touch with my emotions than I am currently. Journaling can make you more self-aware and help you deal with difficult situations in life. In particular, black women face a daily battle with many systems of oppression which place pressure on us to think, look, feel and act a certain way. A journal can be a safe space to say whatever you want without judgement and to begin the process of healing.
Give Yourself Words of Affirmation
You can also try keeping an affirmation journal, which is specifically designed to boost your confidence. Rather than simply keeping track of your everyday emotions like a regular journal, an affirmation journal is meant to be your go-to place for a boost of positivity. You can spend time listing your positive qualities and any exciting goals you are working towards. Thai Nguyen from Huffington Post writes, “Journaling about a positive experience allows your brain to relive it” which later provides a shield for future self-doubt.
Surround Yourself With Positive People
The people you spend your time with ought to be people who support, appreciate and respect you and the unique contribution only you can bring to the world. If not, interactions with toxic friends can leave you feeling drained and overly negative. If your current friends don’t make the cut, it just might be time to find a new squad.
It’s easy to get taken advantage of when you’re under the curse of people-pleasing. Thankfully, learning how to say no will help build your confidence and prevent you from placing your worth in what you can do for others. First, you’ll have to accept that it’s impossible to make everyone happy–and it’s not even worth the hassle of trying! It’s true that as a black girl, saying no puts us at risk of being cast into the angry black woman stereotype or being labelled as difficult and uncooperative. Still, it is important to remember that you always have the right to say no.