I am saying this with love, as I completely understand where she is coming from. I was in that space once upon of time. I remember just how rejected, shocked, upset, and betrayed I felt knowing that the community who was supposed to love and support my phenotype hated it. I went through the think pieces and the reasoning for the worth of black women. However, we as a collective have to realize that they just don’t care.
How long have we been talking about colorism, featurism, and its affects? The conversation is now mainstream so there’s no way the community doesn’t know at this point. They don’t care about logic, emotions, what we say, how we feel. We need to care more about our interests and put ourselves first, instead of hoping for scraps and the bare minimum.
If I were Ari, I’d take me and my talent to whoever appreciates it. I just want black woman to have higher self-esteem, it seems like being stuck in this hamster wheel of wanting and craving black people’s acceptance is making us miserable. To be clear, there isn’t a single group of people who accepts black women by and large, we should know this and be past this rebuttal by now. I am saying that begging for any one group, especially the group we belong to makes us look desperate and worthless.
Of course, I understand that these conversations are important, we need to continue to talk about these issues but I am growing tired of seeing beautiful black women defending their like-ness to a group that doens’t deserve it. I just want for black women in 2020 to start focusing more energy on their own level up, enjoying life and moving in spaces that serve and celebrate us. If we really believe we are queens, we need to learn that we don’t negotiate our worth and we certainly do not beg.